How about a Venti-vent??

It amazes me how the military medical care is so inadequate. Our men and women's finest warriors, along with their families, get some of the worst care I have ever seen. You have to see one person, (sometimes not even a qualified medical physician), only to make an appointment to see someone else. Sometimes these appointments can take weeks and even up to a month or so. Sometimes you don't even get a return call from the physician you are seeing. We are lead to believe that Motrin and other various pills, are the magic we need to get over what ever we are experiencing. "Having stomach pain? Here's some Motrin!" "Lower back pain for three months, here's some lidocaine patches, narcotics, and Motrin!" Pills, pills, and more pills. Our home looks like our own personal pharmacy, from things such as the wonderful army Motrin to the Percocets and nexium pills that are magically suppose to fix the issues without further tests! The stomach issues I speak of resulted in a gallbladder removal. The lower back pain, 4 bulging disks and some large fibroids (so they say) magically shown in the MRI. Just a whole bunch of pills and wasted time to sugar coat a condition. I am amazed at how shitty our health care is. We send our men and women into harms way for whatever the reasoning may be at the time. The families that are left behind due to deployments, or the spouses and children who sacrifice the packing up, whenever duty calls, and leaving friends and family behind countless times, usually ending with finding new people all over again to form some sort of friendship with. These are the people who we owe support to. Personal support, mental and physical support, as well as the most important-medical??? So please tell me why, as a military spouse and mother of two, why is our medical care the worst I have ever seen? Why do you continue to prescribe pills to cover up an issue rather than run some freaking tests to rule out everything 

else? Maybe I'm just some hypochondriac (ok I know I am), but usually it works better to rule out all the above before sending home a pill that you have no idea if it's even gonna work, nor do you even know what the hell the problem is!! 

Free-falling

The temperature has been really nice lately; 80's with cooler evenings and mornings. I have to admit that fall is my favorite season, at least when it can actually be a season. People have been decorating for Halloween already, and it's not even October yet. We really won't be doing much decorating this year, due to the fact that we will be PCSing during the fall/winter time frame. Tim received his orders and they state how we could arrive as early as November 17th. We probably won't head there till winter break which is actually the same time both here and Hawaii. I'm trying to imagine it all in my head but the more and more I think about the move, the more tension I am filled with. Moving, in general is hard! When your a military family, moving is second nature. Nonetheless, it doesn't get any easier no matter how many times you do it. I'm already dreading going through our things and seeing what we won't be needing anymore. (Hawaii weather is 80's year round... Guess we won't need 'winter clothes' and things of that nature for a while. Another thing I dread is leaving my job. Even though I joke around constantly and say to my coworkers how I can't wait to leave or I teasingly tell them I won't be in when I know I will, I'm truly gonna miss going to a place where I love to be. Working at the vet clinic has been such a blessing to me. I not only work hard for my money, lol, but I am good at it and I love to do it! It's funny that I can tell a person by their pet!! Can't remember the owners name yet I can sure remember all the "Bella's, max's, Jacks', Sam's, etc etc".  It's become my second home and leaving is going to be deeply hard for me. 

This is one of our patients, Groot! He's a blue Dane 😊. How can someone not love their job where they get to love on puppies and kitties all day long??

Look at these babies!?! I can't hold them like I can puppies but they are joys too! And of course my co-workers... Can't say enough about "most" of them. I truly have bonded with some awesome ladies, and have learned so much more than I ever cared to before this job. The vets have shared things with me that I actually have learned something about!! Talk about OJT. I feel pretty confident that I will be leaving my mark here at the clinic and all I can hope for is a kick-ass receptionist like me to fill my void. 

Another thing I love about fall is pumpkin everything!!! Had to make the IHOP dinner run for their awesome pumpkin pancakes! Can't help it, those are a weakness of mine!! 

Other than that, just bracing myself for what's ahead! October will be my month of getting back into running, one foot in front of the other. These last 6 months of being on a no run profile have sucked and I can't wait to pound some pavement and feel the breeze in my face.. Besides, I need to be "bikini" ready for Hawaii, and pretty much the next two years! 😜

Here's to Positivity....

So, I been pretty down and out since injuring my back and not being able to do certain things, like RUN! I have been having these moments where I want to strap on my sneaks and just head out, but there is a fear now that if I do that, I will hurt my back all over again.  I have been given the "ok" to do it, but my mind has been freaking me out and telling me that I can't do it.  I don't like feeling like I can't do something.  Especially something as awesome as running.  I have seen posts from friends and family members, who are getting it done, so what is my excuse?

Today is September 22nd.  It's been 6 months since I ran last.  I think taking all this time has greatly improved my back situation, however, it has put a huge damper on where my progress was before.  I know that I am not going to be able to cover 6 miles without an issue.  I know I will have to start slow, but I feel like dang, I worked SO HARD to where I was 6 months ago, that now I will never get back to that again.  I know that is all in my head, and that the evil conscience is playing tricks on me, but it's been really weighing me down.  I know what I need to do, it's just a matter of doing it.  Easier said then done.

This was me, a Happy Runner...

December already....

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas here at Fort Sill, however the weather seems to say it's not... We are still hitting almost the 80's here, but we have had a few cold days.  I am assuming that there will be NO snow days here.  What a bummer for our household.  But, we will survive just fine.  (As long as no tornados happen on that note!) After my parents left from spending Thanksgiving with us, we went on a light decorating fit..  I must say my husband and I did a spectacular job.  Lol.

Mason's basketball season has come to an end.  No more 0630 school drop-offs for practice, YES!!  That can get to be annoying on a daily basis if you ask me.  Tim would do it most of the time, but when he was gone, ugh, I am so not that morning person... Not at that time yet anyways.  But, Mason played a great season and we are so proud of our lil athlete.  Now, we can't wait for Baseball season.  That is our sport.  And Mason's, although he will say it's not.  Too bad lil man, baseball is your sport and you will be in the MLB one day, I just know it...  =)  Playing for the Yankees, ha!  (Tim would disown him hehe)

Maddie has been put into the Christmas play at her school, "Dear Santa".  She plays one of the children and has been practicing her part and I can't wait to go and watch it.  I will have pics to post, but it's not until sometime next week.  I will have to update another blog and show all =)  Both kids are STRAIGHT A students and we couldn't be prouder.  It's amazing how resilient they are and how they have begun to adjust well.  They are still missing Korea and their friends from there, but they do keep in touch with them via todays technology, Facetime, Skype, etc.  They both have friends here too, but it's not the same as it was there.  I hope that their friend groups continue to grow and they can make good friends here too.

Tim has taken up a new hobby-Hunting.  =/  He goes almost every Saturday and well, hasn't had much luck yet.  He took Mason one morning, and well, he lasted till about lunchtime and then had to come home..  Not his thing.  But, Tim has been enjoying it and so I am thrilled he has found something that he enjoys and can do with some of his work buddies.

Tim and Mason, waiting for an Elk

Mason, looking bored...

All three dogs are doing well.  Jax is HUGE!!  He seems to never stop growing, lol.  Sookie is recovering from a double ear infection, but other then that, she is great!  She still looks so tiny to me, but Tim says she's getting bigger.  I don't see it because I see her everyday.  But, she feels heavier...  Ha!  And Stormy, I think she is done with puppies.  They try and play with her, but she's not really playful anymore.  I think because she is 6 maybe that is why she's not as into rough housing and playing with things like the new one's are?  I don't know.  I just know she is my girl.  And she gets just as much love as others.  I need to get them stocking stuffers soon.  Although there is NO WAY i can put them out till night before.  Jax WILL eat them all.  He is a monster.  A good one.  But a HUGE one.  (Does that make sense?)

We had the blessing from a friend of mine, Britney, to take our family pictures for Christmas.  She did some of the most amazing photos we have had ever had done!  We are so grateful for her friendship and her talent.  I couldn't have been happier with our pics and hope you enjoy seeing them too.

And saving the best for last, we celebrated another wonderful birthday for Tim.  Another year older, wiser, and grayer I told him, lol.  No, as he ages, the handsomer he is =)  Happy Birthday to the most amazing man I know and am so lucky to have.

Love to all, xoxoxo

Lots to be Thankful for...

Halloween was a DUD here at Fort Sill, at least in our neighboring housing areas...  Not many people handed out candy or decorated this year.  Must be all the financial issues that are going on with the economy and job cuts...  Too bad Romney didn't win..  (oops, did i say that)  This kids did have somewhat of a good time and if you ask me, the got plenty of candy.  More than enough.  I think Halloween is coming to an end for them, dressing up and all.  They are 11, and soon to be 10, I mean, how long do you dress up for?  I don't remember.  Lol.  Maddie wanted to be an 80's girl, (not sure where that one came from this time...) and Mason was a skeleton.  Here's their adorable pics... Oh yah, I even dressed up the dogs, for a brief moment for pics...  Jax was a Black Ops mutt, and Stormy, a BIG bumblebee..

November is the month for thankfulness and being grateful for all the blessings that we have.  I have given this blog posting a lot of thought, in fact, I been sitting here for about an hour and a half just thinking of how I wanted to write this one.  I have been daily posting on my Facebook, the things that I am thankful for, however, there really isn't enough time in the day to sit here and name them all.  Of course, I am thankful for God's forgiveness and grace, my husband, my kids, my family, my life...  And then the list goes on and on.  So, as you are reading this, just know that there is so many things that I am thankful for and if you are reading this, you are probably one of them =)

So far for November, the family and I have been LOVING the cooler weather.  Well, Tim, not so much!  He's more of a warmer weather type, which I don't get being that he IS from Massachusettes.  The weather has been in the 20-30's in the early mornings, and then up to 60's. Great weather for running I must say.  I have been improving so much, that I can now run 4-5 miles nonstop.  And, still can breathe after.  Hehe.  I just have been enjoying the music, the pavement, and the sweat!  Plus, I got into a pair of jeans that I haven't been able to since before moving to Korea, lol.  Can't beat that..

Jax meeting Sookie first time =)

November has also been the start of basketball season for Mason.  He has practice every weekday morning, at 0645, BEFORE school.  Yah, this has taken some getting use to for ALL of us, but it's been great, and we are so excited for his first game on the 19th.  (I will keep everyone posted)  Also, my parents are coming out for Thanksgiving.  YAY!!!!  Haven't seen family, besides on the computer, since before Korea as well.  So, getting to have family with us, and for Thanksgiving especially, is extra special.  Tim and I are already talking about all the things we are going to make them for dinner and whether we should do this, do that?  Fun fun.  The first few days though, kids and Tim will be out at work and school, so it should just be me and my parents....  Don't know how I will keep them occupied but I am ready for them.  They will be staying at the cabins on post, at Letra, because they will be bringing their dogs too.  And, well, 5 dogs in the house is WAY too much for anyone to handle.    Speaking of dogs, we added to our Dane brood.  Sookie, born August 25th, was brought to us a little over a week ago.  She is a mantle dane, and she was given to us by our breeder due to Jax's health issues.  Still we are unsure as to the extent to his heart issue for now, but in the meantime, it's been a ton of fun watching him with the new little one.  Now he knows how poor Stormy felt when he first came home, lol.  

Well, that's it for this one.  I will write again after Thanksgiving.  I hope everyone has a wonderful BLESSED Thanksgiving!!! I know I will =)

Things that make you say hmmmm...

     Well October is quickly fading into November, and I can't believe how fast it has flown by.  Tomorrow is Halloween already, geesh.  This month however, I am ready to bid farewell to.  It has really been nothing but a "PAIN".

     In the beginning of the month, we had a health scare with Tim.  Everything was fine and peachy.  We all went to Applebees for dinner, and then a quick stop to the Starbucks for our monthly coffee treat.  On the way home from there, we all were chit chatting and having our normal family conversations like usual in the car, about school, friends, "who farted?",you name it.  The "normal" family talk.  Ok, well it might not be "normal" for your family, but that's pretty much to the "T" for us.  We get home, get situated.  Kids in jammies, Tim on his man-chair with the remote, and me, well I had just got a phone call from my bestie in NJ.  So, instead of being rude and loud in front of everyone, I took my call outside.  Maybe ten minutes into my phone call, Tim comes to the door and he looked horrible.  His face was pale and he was grabbing at his abdomen/chest area, and he said the words I thought I would NEVER hear come from his mouth, "Take me to the ER".  I was like, what???  I hung up on my friend, and yes, started panicking.  Well, when you look at your spouse, grabbing their mid section, what is the first thing that comes to mind?  For me, and actually for him this time, we BOTH thought heart...  So, Tim is holding himself up against the wall and kept saying how it hurt and he couldn't breathe, I grabbed the phone and dialed 911.  Tim yells at me and is like, "No 911, you need to drive me!"  I'm like a nervous wreck so I hung up the phone before anyone even answered, knowing that I was soon going to get either a call or a cop at the house.  Sure as I was about to head out the door with Tim, they call back.  "9-1-1, you just called?"  "Yes ma'am, my husband is having trouble breathing and he's complaining of pain, and I'm FREAKING OUT... However he's being a stubborn ass and doesn't want you all involved and wants me to DRIVE him to the ER."  They understood and told me to put my hazards on so that if I was speeding and a cop saw me, they would know I was on way to ER.  So, Tim and I make our way to the car, get in, and didn't even buckle...  Stupid I know, but I couldn't think of anything but getting him there FAST.  (Probably another great reason to be buckled!)  Tim is leaning out the window, moaning and breathing raspy, and I'm speeding all over post, rushing to the ER.  I illegally park, and run him up to the front desk.  A nurse came out, took his vitals, and ha, told us to sit in waiting room to be called!!  Gotta love the military system!  After a few minutes of frustration and fear, they call him into a bed.  The medic did the norm, hooked him up to the BP cuff, SPO2 and pulse machine.  Ran vitals, all looked ok.  In the whole time, Tim is in pain and still breathing funny.  The medic takes down information and comes back with a cup of this concoction of benedryl, maalox, and lidocaine.  The GI cocktail they called it.  Tim drank it and before he knew it his tongue, throat, and everything that this liquid touched went numb.  Including some of the pain.  Xrays were then ordered to see what this exactly was, and we once again were on the wait for results.  Finally after a few hours, the Doc comes in and tells us it's blocked air in his large upper intestine, forcing pressure into his diaphragm and that's whats causing the breathing issues and pain.  In other words, a HUGE GAS BUBBLE!!!  Tim and I were in disbelief.  There is NO WAY that that was caused by gas...  So, after a dose of Morphine, (pain came back) and embarrassed feelings, we were sent home.  Gas?  Really?  Could something as simple as air bubbles, cause so much trouble?  Apparently from them and my stepmom, who specializes in Gastro-that yes, gas can make you feel like you are dying.  Amazing.

     After this incident, it took some time to feel ok.  Tim was still in disbelief that that happened and having pains still, and worrying that it was more, and well I was just so scared, that it took like so much out of me.  I felt like I was beaten with a stick the next few days afterwards. Then, he was back to normal for the most part.  And I was thankful.  The sight of watching your spouse suffer from something you have no control over is horrible.   I don't ever want to go through anything like it again.  

     Just when things begin to get better, I got slapped in the face with the news that my baby Dane has something wrong with his heart.  I took him in for a routine appointment, and his last set of puppy shots, and while the vet was performing his assessment, he listens to his heart sound extra long.  Then listens to the other side, then the other.  Then tells me he wants to get the other vet next door to come take a listen.  Meanwhile, Jax and I look at each other like "what now?"  The other vet comes in, places the stethescope onto Jax's chest, listens, then the other side, then back again, and looks at me and says, "There is something wrong with his heart." (My vet even called me over to listen myself to Jax's heartbeat).  So, there I go again, FREAKING out.  Asking a bazillion questions, and trying to figure out what it could be and so on...  I was told it could be one of three things:  a murmur, which is something people and animals live with forever, a tear possibly from his seizures he had a while back, or a hole, that's basically growing along with him, and that could be why it was never heard before, and that it could heard now that he's bigger. My vet told me that he didn't have the right equipment to further look into the heart issue there, that Jax would need an Echocardiagram.  And, the only places that do that here are A,B,C....  So, those were my options.  However, the vet said, lets not panic, (HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!), lets re-check him in 3 weeks, and see what and if there is any change in sound.  After paying the outrageous bill, (why are vets so expensive)  I then, looked at Jax with a more profound love for an animal, one I think I never had before, until that moment.

     The drive home was a quiet one, just Jax and me.  He had benedryl in his system from his immunizations, and so he was dopey and falling all over the seats.  Then he finally crashed until we got home.  Once home, I helped him down from the truck, and came inside.  It then hit me, and I broke down.  I could NOT contain myself.  How could something be wrong with Jax now?  What if this, what if that.  What if he dies?  I freaked out and just layed with him on the floor and sobbed.  In only a short time, I have fallen so inlove with my little guy.  And yes, maybe I overreacted because it is just a dog, and I did THANK GOD it wasn't any of my humans.  But, I love Jax and as a dog mother, I was devastated.  I called my breeder and told her the news.  She told me to just hold on and see what the next appt says.  If I didn't want him anymore, she would gladly take him back.  Like, if he is going to die, depending on the circumstance, and if I can't handle it, then she would.  It was like, I didn't even want to think of giving him back.  That was the hardest part for me to fathom.  Having to say goodbye to my little precious baby.  Ugh.  It was pretty bad.  But, I think I needed to breakdown that day.  I picked myself up and trudged on.  I look at him everyday, and he seems fine, NORMAL, crazy as ever.  We play, we love, and we live.  And will just have to wait and see what the vet says next week.  Tim and I decided that if there is something serious, and Jax's lifespan will be shortened, then he will live on with us.  No one else.  And we will try whatever we can to make it the happiest, most precious time with him.  I love everyday I get to see his face... and if it's for a little time, then I will cherish what time we have...together.

     After finally calming down, and going on with things..  Some crazy weather rolls in sets my Panic meter rocketing...  I just can't win.   I was preparing for a Wizard of Oz story of my own...  So, October, you rolled in with some punches and I am ready to boot you in rear and bring on November.  

Woodbine Pumpkin Farm Fun!!!

 We took a drive 2 hours away to this amazing Pumpkin Farm/patch.  It was amazing and we all had a alot of fun.  The kids got to play some games and and we were also loving the petting farm.. Their mini horses I wanted so bad, lol.  (even though I have some of my own at home) Hope you all enjoy the pics.  New blog to come, with everyday life stuff....